5 things designers want to tell PMs (but don't)

This article is based on Adil Dhanani’s brilliant talk at the Product-Led Summit in Austin. PLA members can enjoy the complete recording here. 

Product managers and designers work together all the time, but do we always understand each other? 

Frankly, no. 

Sometimes, it feels like we’re speaking different languages, even though we’re trying to achieve the same goal. 

As the Director of Product Design at Slack, I’ve seen firsthand the challenges that arise when PMs and designers aren’t fully aligned – and I want to share some of those insights with you. So in this article, I’m going to share five things designers wish they could tell their PMs – but usually don’t.

This isn’t about calling anyone out (though you might feel a little called out). It’s about getting real so we can work better together and build great products.

Understanding the PM-designer relationship 

To kick things off, I’ve rounded up a few of the best PM and designer memes out there. A few of them might just hit a little too close to home.

As much as we can laugh about these memes, there’s some truth behind them. That’s why I want to dig deeper into the PM-designer relationship, not just from my experience but from the experiences of my team as well. 

So, I sent out a message asking my team what they’d love for PMs to know, learn, or do to improve collaboration. Let me tell you – the responses came in fast! Some were constructive, others blunt, and a few were... let’s just say I won’t share those, or I might get fired. 

As I read through their answers, I noticed a few patterns, which we’ll dive into in a moment. It turns out, designers tend to struggle with the same things when working with PMs.

Why PMs and designers need to build better relationships

Why does all this matter? Because when PMs and designers work well together, we make better products. It’s really that simple. 

This isn’t about PMs versus designers. It’s about aligning each team – not just working side by side but truly thinking like partners. At the end of the day, we’re not competing; we’re on the same team. Our shared goal is to build products that people love. When we understand each other, we can do that more effectively.

Now, without further ado, let’s dive into the five things that designers wish product managers understood.

1. We should be interchangeable in meetings

The first thing designers wish PMs understood is that we should be interchangeable in meetings. PMs and designers should be so aligned that when one of us isn’t in the meeting, the other can confidently represent our shared perspective. 

Too often, designers feel like they have to defend their design decisions because PMs don’t understand the rationale behind them. On the flip side, PMs sometimes feel the burden of holding the product strategy without any input from design. 

A lesson on PM-designer alignment from Uber

So, how do we fix this?

One way I’ve seen this work in my career is through constant context-sharing – not just in big strategy meetings but in our day-to-day work. If we’re truly collaborating, we should be able to advocate for each other.

The first time I really noticed this happening was during my time at Uber. Sometimes, it was hard to tell who was the PM and who was the designer in a meeting. It was fascinating. The designer was 80% designer and 20% PM, and the PM was 80% PM and 20% designer. 

I loved that because they were able to represent each other in meetings so well. They had a shared understanding and had spent so much time learning each other’s roles – not just on the team but across the entire company.

2. Be my thought partner, not just a task manager

We’re all building product experiences together, and both PMs and designers co-own that experience. Designers shouldn’t just execute decisions – we should be shaping them together.

Too often, designers are brought in too late in the development process. The exec team has already set the strategy, and a bunch of people have decided on the direction. Then, they come back to the designer and say, “Here’s the strategy.” 

I’ve had this happen plenty of times – I'll be told, “We decided it at the off-site in Australia. It was awesome! Anyway, here’s the strategy. The Jira tickets are on their way.”

Junior designers might just roll with it, but for the more senior folks, this can be frustrating. As designers gain more experience, they develop a stronger product sense because, at the end of the day, they’re just as responsible for the product as anyone else on the team.

In my experience, the best PMs don’t just hand off work to designers. They bring us in – not only to solve problems but to help find the problems too. Instead of saying, “Here are the designs,” or “Here’s what we need,” they ask, “How might we solve this problem together?” This is really about bringing people together and making sure everyone is along for the ride.